Organizing the Command Center

Finally! It has been driving me bonkers that my command center--ground zero of home organization--was not organized.

Our amazing carpenter, Joe Yoder, designed the command center for us, unlike the kitchen, which I detailed pretty well for him. We didn't have a kitchen desk in the old house, so it was all new. All I knew I wanted was one place to keep everything I need to run the house, and the ability to keep everything tucked away.

Joe came by a few weeks ago to put a center support in the bookshelves. Since I had to clear everything out to let him work, I refused to just drudge everything back. There would be ORDER!
I started by putting my cooking binders and cookbooks on the bottom of the two shelves. I decided that the top shelf would be great for family photos. No more staging for me. My house will look like a home, not a model!

I got the idea to use post it notes to test out placement of different items to see how they worked.

 

I've been pretty happy with the placement for the last few days. (And happy with my little helper, who loves the central vacuum!)

I started out by making labels for the little cubbies. I used a piece of scrapbook paper and stickers from the dollar bin at Target.

The nine cubbies are:

1. Memory. This is the memory box where I keep all the cute things I want to remember. It's a new thing I'm trying. The idea is that at the end of the year, you can read all the fun things that happened over the year.
2. Glasses. My neuro-opthalmologist wants me to wear my prism glasses whenever I'm looking at a TV, driving, exercising, or doing anything that requires looking in the distance. She also wants me to wear my reading glasses when I'm on the computer. I always forgot because it's a pain to constantly switch my glasses. Hopefully, this will help.
3. Coupons. We buy most of our food in bulk, so I don't use a lot of coupons, but I do keep ones for the craft stores, Bed Bath and Beyond, and a few other things.
4. In. This is the mail that comes in before it is filed or processed. Usually it means I have something to show/ask Niels.
5. Pending. This is the larger opening. I put my daily-do list there, as well as anything that I'm waiting on something to complete.
6. Out. This is where I put bills to put in the mailbox or other things that need to be mailed or delivered.
7. Envelopes. Yep, that's what it is.
8. HSA. Niels, saint that he is, takes care of our HSA statements. I plan to stick my medical bills in there and let him magically take care of them.
9. House. Because our house is new and we like our builder, and because we really appreciated the home owners who let us see their homes, we let prospective Charis home owners tour our home. This is where I keep flyers and business cards for our cabinet maker.

It's hard to get a picture of the whole command center. It's about 9' long and 9' high. It's recessed into the wall, so you don't see it from the great room or mudroom, which is nice, if, hypothetically speaking, it wasn't neat and tidy.

Now for the tour. Starting with the left side cabinets, there are three shelves, 2 with small bins, and one with binders. As you can see the big binder sticks out a little. If I were doing it again, I would make the cabinet an inch or so deeper. The binders hold our owners manuals, warranties, and every selection we made on the house (appliances, paint colors, flooring, etc.) The thin blue books are my copies of the book I wrote for my son.

D on book day.

The top basket is for projects supplies like puffy paint and glitter that I want far, far from little boy hands.

 

The second basket has house hold papers like receipts and promo materials that need to be filed in our house binders, and papers about projects we still need to do, like landscaping.

 

The bottom cabinet looks like this:

The basket holds the power cable for the printer, as well as extra ink. If you look closely, you can see that we have two outlets in there. One is for the printer (there's a hole to the right of the cabinet for the cord) and the other is for the LED light. We should have put 4 outlets, with the face sideways. Originally, I wanted to plug in my camera charger there, but if I do, it's so long that I can't use the other outlet. It's not a big deal at this point, and I can always use an extension cord later.

There's another bin on the shelf below the basket, which I labeled "sort-do-file." What it really means is, "Someone is coming over and I want to look organized, so where can I put this pile of papers?!" Voila! I know I'm going to do it, so let's just be honest about it and make a space for it.

 

Down to the drawers. The top drawer is for computer paper. We try to recycle paper unless it has to be clean, new paper. My current solution is to use foil pans for dividers.

 Second drawer: sheet protectors and labels in more foil pans.

Third drawer: bubble envelopes and plastic folders. I use these folders for individual projects. For example, right now I have one for landscaping. If you look closely, you can see that I have a piece of masking tape on the bottom. I write the project on the bottom, and then put any paper on the subject inside so everything is in one place.

 Bottom drawer: magazines to read.

There are two rows of drawers on each side. The outer drawers are wider, and the inner drawers are narrow. Top drawer: photo paper.

 Second, third, and bottom drawer: my shredder.

 This is one thing I knew I wanted and asked Joe to incorporate. The shredder slides out when needed, and because there is an outlet against the wall, it never has to be unplugged.

Above the desk and under the cubbies are two magnetic dry erase boards. The one on the right is my prayer board and memory verse for the month. You can see the angled outlets from this angle. They are hidden if you are standing up.

The other board has info on upcoming evens, my daily reminders and a milk allergy cheat sheet.

I have two large shallow drawers under my desktop. I put two jewelry dividers in the one on the left to hold all the little accessories of the office: magnets, push pins, rubber bands, etc.

The right drawer has all the essentials: pens, sharpies, note cards, etc.

The narrow row of right drawers, starting at the top: all the cords and my helpful assistant, my labeler.

Second row: connectors, for a lack of a better word. This drawer holds my stapler, hole punch, tape and glue.

 Third row: stationery, because I intend to get back to writing letters.

 Bottom drawer: D's drawer. A place for my son's office supplies.

Right outer drawers, from the top: Important info--all the things I need to find regularly in one place.

 Second row: notepads, because I am forever making lists.

 Third row: project paper.

Bottom row: projects. Here's the envelope with all my drafts of my book, plus the start of the follow up.

Right cabinets, on top: two more bins and a row of binders. The binders contain our medical files. On the door is a list of all my doctors. 

 

The top bin is for (small) projects in process. Mostly pictures waiting for frames or canvas.

 

The bottom bin holds our library books. This forces me to not check out the whole library at once.

 

The bottom cabinet holds our budget binders, planning calendar, menu planning binder, little bins with everything I need to pay bills, and our receipt jar.

On the top of the command center, I have four clocks waiting for batteries. There is a clock for each time zone where our extended family lives.  I bought the clocks at Target, and put sticky letters on them.

And lastly, on the top bookshelf, I put a few family photos. I'll update them eventually with different frames, but that will require more boxes to unpack first.

Overall, I'm thrilled with how it turned out, and am so happy to finally put it to good use! In case anyone is reading this with plans to build there own, here are my words of advice:

If I were to build this command center again (aka, if I knew what I was doing when it was laid out), I would...

1. Make the cabinets an inch or so deeper to accommodate even 3" binders
2. Make the shelves a little higher to allow two rows of books, if wanted. As it is, I have room for one row of books/binders, and only a shallow shelf above. It works, but I would have liked the flexibility.
3. Four outlets, instead of two in the cabinet, and placed sideways to allow for larger plug-ins to work.

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Organizing the Frig

 

A few months ago, at D's 3-year well child exam, his pediatrician referred us to an ENT to test him for allergies. He's always had rosy cheeks and has been a bit snuffly, but we didn't really think much of it. We just thought it was a cold, or teething, or something. 

It took awhile to get our appointment, but after a very quick listen and look at D, the ENT suspected that D had some food allergies, and based on our conversation about the little dairy king, she suspected that the culprit was dairy. It took a few days to get the results of the blood draw. (during which, D was a total champ. Just held out his arm and watched. Not a peep, not a tear). And yes, no more dairy for the dairy king.

The good news is that he'll probably grow out of it eventually, and it isn't life threatening, though if he continued to eat dairy, it could lead to asthma. 

So, my project over the last few days was reading lots and LOTS of labels to see what is safe and what is not for D. It's easy to find substitute for the obvious things like milk, yogurt and cream, but dairy products are used as a binder is so many other things, we really have to check our labels. 

I decided that what would be easiest is to mark safe and unsafe items for D (who is quickly learning to read!). Here's how our frig looks now:

Our new frig is just the right size for everything we need.

Inside, I used labels and tubs to keep everything in order.

The Use First bin for is everything that's opened and nearly expiration. When I plan my menu for the week, I peek in there to see what I need to incorporate. We tend to buy produce on a weekly need basis, so this keeps us from wasting food.

 The bin on the bottom rack is where I thaw whatever meat I need out of the freezer.

The skinny section is just the right size for the non-dairy butter, eggs, flaxseed and wheat germ.

What's left of our dairy supply.

The bottom part of the frig includes a bin for cooking condiments,  a SAFE for D drawer so he can choose his own snacks) and the produce drawer.

By putting all the cooking condiments together, I can just grab the bin and pull out what I need, instead of hunting for  the right bottle. I consider cooking condiments as anything we would only use when making a meal, and not things that could be used for snacking or single purpose, like minced garlic, soy sauce, etc.

Good thing it's shopping day tomorrow. His options are limited!

On the outside of the frig, the top two compartments include cooking items (soup base, yeast and non-dairy butter), and regular condiments like ketchup, mustard, mayo, etc.

Niels isn't ready to give up dairy yet, so he gets a shelf for his dairy products.The lower shelf is a safe shelf with almond and coconut milks. 

D's non-dairy smorgasbord.

I'm very grateful that I'm already cooking most meals from scratch, because I already have great control over what goes into our meals. Almond milk and coconut milk are easy substitutes for cow's milk. Vegan butter (Earth Balance, for example), margarine and coconut oil work well for butter. I'm experimenting with canned coconut milk as a substitute for cream (it's not quite as thick, but it'll work). And after Easter, we're try some coconut ice cream. It's hard to give up cheese, especially as a Dutch family, but hopefully, we'll enjoy our kaas again in a few years.

Next to make safe: the pantry!

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My Spare Spoon

I'm taking a slight detour for our regular home-related posts because this is what's on my mind, and because it explains so well, why the home-related going (and posting) is so slow now. In short, I'm at a loss for spoons. 

The article below, "The Spoon Theory," was written by someone with lupus to explain what it's like to live with an invisible disability, but it's very applicable to someone with Traumatic Brain Injury (TBI), like me. It's been eight years since my injury, but I still have to "watch my spoons," and I reluctantly realize that I will continue to do so for the rest of my life. In fact, we built this house to help "save my spoons." By paying special attention to sound proofing and universal design, as well as building in a neighborhood with kids D's age, our hope is that I will have more good days.

I especially like the last couple of paragraphs. I constantly struggle with feeling bad for having to cancel plans and have a hard time articulating how grateful I am to friends who are willing to meet me wherever I am that day (physically and/or emotionally). So, thanks to my friend Janice, who originally shared this with me, to my friends and family who stuck with me through the transition from old Jen to new Jen, to my post-TBI friends here in Ohio who have taken the time to learn about my limitations, and most of all to my amazing husband who has taken that whole "in sickness and health" thing to the limit. - Jen

The Spoon Theory 

My best friend and I were in the diner, talking. As usual, it was very late and we were eating French fries with gravy. Like normal girls our age, we spent a lot of time in the diner while in college, and most of the time we spent talking about boys, music or trivial things, that seemed very important at the time. We never got serious about anything in particular and spent most of our time laughing. 


As I went to take some of my medicine with a snack as I usually did, she watched me with an awkward kind of stare, instead of continuing the conversation. She then asked me out of the blue what it felt like to have Lupus and be sick. I was shocked not only because she asked the random question, but also because I assumed she knew all there was to know about Lupus. She came to doctors with me, she saw me walk with a cane, and throw up in the bathroom. She had seen me cry in pain, what else was there to know? 


I started to ramble on about pills, and aches and pains, but she kept pursuing, and didn't seem satisfied with my answers. I was a little surprised as being my roommate in college and friend for years; I thought she already knew the medical definition of Lupus. Then she looked at me with a face every sick person knows well, the face of pure curiosity about something no one healthy can truly understand. She asked what it felt like, not physically, but what it felt like to be me, to be sick. 


As I tried to gain my composure, I glanced around the table for help or guidance, or at least stall for time to think. I was trying to find the right words. How do I answer a question I never was able to answer for myself? How do I explain every detail of every day being effected, and give the emotions a sick person goes through with clarity. I could have given up, cracked a joke like I usually do, and changed the subject, but I remember thinking if I don’t try to explain this, how could I ever expect her to understand. If I can’t explain this to my best friend, how could I explain my world to anyone else? I had to at least try. At that moment, the spoon theory was born. I quickly grabbed every spoon on the table; I grabbed spoons off of the other tables. I looked at her in the eyes and said “Here you go, you have Lupus”. She looked at me slightly confused, as anyone would when they are being handed a bouquet of spoons. The cold metal spoons clanked in my hands, as I grouped them together and shoved them into her hands.I explained that the difference in being sick and being healthy is having to make choices or to consciously think about things when the rest of the world doesn’t have to. The healthy have the luxury of a life without choices, a gift most people take for granted. 


Most people start the day with unlimited amount of possibilities, and energy to do whatever they desire, especially young people. For the most part, they do not need to worry about the effects of their actions. So for my explanation, I used spoons to convey this point. I wanted something for her to actually hold, for me to then take away, since most people who get sick feel a “loss” of a life they once knew. If I was in control of taking away the spoons, then she would know what it feels like to have someone or something else, in this case Lupus, being in control. 


She grabbed the spoons with excitement. She didn’t understand what I was doing, but she is always up for a good time, so I guess she thought I was cracking a joke of some kind like I usually do when talking about touchy topics. Little did she know how serious I would become? 


I asked her to count her spoons. She asked why, and I explained that when you are healthy you expect to have a never-ending supply of "spoons". But when you have to now plan your day, you need to know exactly how many “spoons” you are starting with. It doesn’t guarantee that you might not lose some along the way, but at least it helps to know where you are starting. She counted out 12 spoons. She laughed and said she wanted more. I said no, and I knew right away that this little game would work, when she looked disappointed, and we hadn't even started yet. I’ve wanted more "spoons" for years and haven’t found a way yet to get more, why should she? I also told her to always be conscious of how many she had, and not to drop them because she can never forget she has Lupus. 


I asked her to list off the tasks of her day, including the most simple. As, she rattled off daily chores, or just fun things to do; I explained how each one would cost her a spoon. When she jumped right into getting ready for work as her first task of the morning, I cut her off and took away a spoon. I practically jumped down her throat. I said " No! You don’t just get up. You have to crack open your eyes, and then realize you are late. You didn’t sleep well the night before. You have to crawl out of bed, and then you have to make your self something to eat before you can do anything else, because if you don’t, you can't take your medicine, and if you don’t take your medicine you might as well give up all your spoons for today and tomorrow too." I quickly took away a spoon and she realized she hasn’t even gotten dressed yet. Showering cost her spoon, just for washing her hair and shaving her legs. Reaching high and low that early in the morning could actually cost more than one spoon, but I figured I would give her a break; I didn’t want to scare her right away. Getting dressed was worth another spoon. I stopped her and broke down every task to show her how every little detail needs to be thought about. You cannot simply just throw clothes on when you are sick. I explained that I have to see what clothes I can physically put on, if my hands hurt that day buttons are out of the question. If I have bruises that day, I need to wear long sleeves, and if I have a fever I need a sweater to stay warm and so on. If my hair is falling out I need to spend more time to look presentable, and then you need to factor in another 5 minutes for feeling badly that it took you 2 hours to do all this. 


I think she was starting to understand when she theoretically didn’t even get to work, and she was left with 6 spoons. I then explained to her that she needed to choose the rest of her day wisely, since when your “spoons” are gone, they are gone. Sometimes you can borrow against tomorrow’s "spoons", but just think how hard tomorrow will be with less "spoons". I also needed to explain that a person who is sick always lives with the looming thought that tomorrow may be the day that a cold comes, or an infection, or any number of things that could be very dangerous. So you do not want to run low on "spoons", because you never know when you truly will need them. I didn’t want to depress her, but I needed to be realistic, and unfortunately being prepared for the worst is part of a real day for me. 


We went through the rest of the day, and she slowly learned that skipping lunch would cost her a spoon, as well as standing on a train, or even typing at her computer too long. She was forced to make choices and think about things differently. Hypothetically, she had to choose not to run errands, so that she could eat dinner that night. 


When we got to the end of her pretend day, she said she was hungry. I summarized that she had to eat dinner but she only had one spoon left. If she cooked, she wouldn’t have enough energy to clean the pots. If she went out for dinner, she might be too tired to drive home safely. Then I also explained, that I didn’t even bother to add into this game, that she was so nauseous, that cooking was probably out of the question anyway. So she decided to make soup, it was easy. I then said it is only 7pm, you have the rest of the night but maybe end up with one spoon, so you can do something fun, or clean your apartment, or do chores, but you can’t do it all.


I rarely see her emotional, so when I saw her upset I knew maybe I was getting through to her. I didn’t want my friend to be upset, but at the same time I was happy to think finally maybe someone understood me a little bit. She had tears in her eyes and asked quietly “Christine, How do you do it? Do you really do this everyday?” I explained that some days were worse then others; some days I have more spoons then most. But I can never make it go away and I can’t forget about it, I always have to think about it. 


I handed her a spoon I had been holding in reserve. I said simply, “I have learned to live life with an extra spoon in my pocket, in reserve. You need to always be prepared” It's hard, the hardest thing I ever had to learn is to slow down, and not do everything. I fight this to this day. I hate feeling left out, having to choose to stay home, or to not get things done that I want to. I wanted her to feel that frustration. I wanted her to understand, that everything someone else does comes so easy, but for me it is one hundred little jobs in one. I need to think about the weather, my temperature that day, and the whole day's plans before I can attack any one given thing. When other people can simply do things, I have to attack it and make a plan like I am strategizing a war. It is in that lifestyle, the difference between being sick and healthy. It is the beautiful ability to not think and just do. I miss that freedom. I miss never having to count "spoons". 


After we were emotional and talked about this for a little while longer, I sensed she was sad. Maybe she finally understood. Maybe she realized that she never could truly and honestly say she understands. But at least now she might not complain so much when I can't go out for dinner some nights, or when I never seem to make it to her house and she always has to drive to mine. I gave her a hug when we walked out of the diner. I had the one spoon in my hand and I said “Don’t worry. I see this as a blessing. I have been forced to think about everything I do. Do you know how many spoons people waste everyday? I don’t have room for wasted time, or wasted “spoons” and I chose to spend this time with you.” 


Ever since this night, I have used the spoon theory to explain my life to many people. In fact, my family and friends refer to spoons all the time. It has been a code word for what I can and cannot do. Once people understand the spoon theory they seem to understand me better, but I also think they live their life a little differently too. I think it isn’t just good for understanding Lupus, but anyone dealing with any disability or illness. Hopefully, they don’t take so much for granted or their life in general. I give a piece of myself, in every sense of the word when I do anything. It has become an inside joke. I have become famous for saying to people jokingly that they should feel special when I spend time with them, because they have one of my "spoons".

A few weeks ago, a friend told me about site called Sunshyn Silver Wear. Erin, who runs the site, makes these necklaces from old spoons. (Recycling is green, so totally relevant to this site!). I'm not a huge jewelry girl, so I like the options made from old baby spoons. I emailed Erin, and she ended up making this custom purple spoon necklace with three gray hearts, to represent the thing I was given after everything the TBI took away, my family. 

I've been wearing the necklace for about a week, and I find myself rubbing the spoon when I need a remind myself of my new mantra: pace, pause, prioritize. I need to pace myself each day, which means taking time to pause and rest every few hours. I know I can't do everything I want to do each day, so I have to prioritize.

It's been quite frustrating to me that I can't get more done each day when it comes to unpacking. Granted, I've never tried unpacking with a small energetic three-year-old, so that just puts me in great company with any parent. I was finally able to articulate my frustration last night as Niels and I were talking. Before my TBI, I really liked to be organized. Since my TBI, I NEED to be organized. My house is not organized right now. The problem is that when a job is too big and overwhelming, I've lost the ability to break it down into smaller tasks. So, life around here lately has been a lot of things that should take 1 spoon, are taking three, but in order to get that process organized, is going to take 5 spoons, which I don't have, because I've been chocking spoons by the handful trying to do the 1 spoon tasks. For example, trying to keep up with the bills has always been my job. All things considered, I'm pretty good at it. Usually, I have everything I need  in one place: budget binder, new bills, envelopes, labels, stamps, stapler, etc. For whatever reason, none of those things are in the same place, so gathering each thing is a spoon suck, and by the time I get everything, I can't think straight to pay the bill correctly, so it gets put off til tomorrow, where I start the day short-spooned. 

So, this weekend, Niels is going to help me get my command center in order. And, apparently, re-organize the pantry to remove all the dairy items to which we learned our son is allergic...sigh...

But first, a nap.